Saturday, January 21, 2012

My Biggest Fan..

Last night, I glanced in the mirror as I was leaving the powder room (Can I tell you that room has the harshest lighting?) and I saw the wrinkles, the lack of youthful, dewy complexion and I sighed.  I looked all of my 41 years.

What's a woman to do?  Post on fb about her plight, of course! Sometimes I look in the mirror and realize I look my age. Need to accept it but I don't have to like it.

Friends posted words of support.  I wasn't fishing for compliments, but it sure was nice.

This morning, the Husband responded like this:  Stacey- A little over 19 years ago a young woman walked out of the backroom of a bookstore- wearing blue walking shorts and cute tights -  I thought I had seen the most beautiful woman in the world- until the next time I saw her and the next time...until I saw her again this morning- now she/you is/are the most beautiful woman in the world. The only age I see when I look at you is the "age of beauty"

Can I hear an "Aaaww."?  What did you learn from that response, other than that I was a preppy dresser in my early 20s?  Did you learn I have an adoring husband?  I thanked him for being my biggest fan.  He totally is.  

A little later I was listening to Dixie Chicks as I got ready to greet the public (I did my hair and put on some makeup to liven up my 41 year-old skin. ;) )  I was singing along to "Wide Open Spaces" and I thought about all the ways the Husband has supported me in the past 19 years, encouraging me to go for dreams even when I doubt my own ability to achieve them. (He had just sat on our bed next to me giving me a pep talk, I wonder if he tires of that?)  

One of the most amazing things he does is give me the space I need to grow. He accepts, affirms even, that I am not going to stay exactly the same as I was when we met.   I wonder if that is the secret to being happily married for almost 19 years?  

That and we can talk about anything.  Anything.  

Sometimes our conversations are unexpected, as a friend might say, they take some left turns, but they are honest and real.  We've gone through some tough stuff, but the toughest times weren't related to money or vocation, they were times when we danced around the issues instead of talking them out.  This is where our mutual love and respect grow and shine.  

So to the Husband, I say thank you for giving me "Wide Open Spaces" to grow through this life, room to make big mistakes, and the support to follow my dreams.  I pray that our kids, all 6 of them, see the love you give to me and use it as a model for their own lives, because it is in the space that we grow and learn and become more fully who we are created to be. 

-Peace

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