Saturday, July 17, 2010

If Patience is a Virtue...

Then impatience is...a vice, right?

There are so many ways to be impatient. I lose patience waiting, I am not always patient with others...I want things when I want them, I sometimes resent the work that goes into a finished product even when I know the outcome will be totally worth the effort and the wait.

We live in an instant gratification society. I like it. Too much. ;) I recognize that. I realize that there are issues with getting everything exactly when I want it and without effort or thought.

I am learning to wait. If there is one thing I have learned from my children, it's waiting. The oldest was 15 days late, the second was 11 days overdue and the third kept us waiting for 4 days. After that I had a new OB in a new place and well, they liked to schedule things, which worked for me. :)

I have no idea how the Dr here feels about it. I'm a little anxious about it, but also very content to wait.

I am in no hurry. I know that shortly after Miss M is due to arrive the boys will be returning to school and as much as they can make me batty, I will miss them and be waiting anxiously for their return home.

I am relaxing into waiting, realizing that as much as I desire a plan, a date and time and a schedule, it's not up to me so much. I am not rushing to prepare, but I am starting to lay the groundwork.

Life has a way of rushing by me, particularly when I'm lacking patience. I miss things. It's like when you take a hike and you walk swiftly with your head down, trying to get to the end. I don't want to walk through life that way.

I'd much rather take it a little slower and see the details. That's something else I've learned from my kids. It's much better to view things through the eyes of a small child. When we're outside *I* will say, "I hear birds" or point to flowers or bugs. At 3 he understand life is about the journey, perhaps because he hasn't got his head down on a mission to reach the destination, a destination he might not even be aware of .

And any of us know what our destination really is or will end up being? We think we do, but life has a way of happening independent of our plans. Patience and observation while on the journey can help us the appreciate our destination.

Thankfully, we're never walking on the journey alone. I love that as I walk through life, I can open up my heart to God and express my impatience. I can express my fears and worries and lack of understanding to Him. I know that if I am open to growing along the journey, if my eyes and heart are open, I will find many reasons to be patient and even awestruck along the way.

My children, in all their imperfect glory, are leading me and teaching me and being the hands and feet of God to me each and every day. (Sometimes it's a little more undercover than others. ;) )

Wishing you pleasure and patience along your journey. We might not always understand the path we're on, but in the long run may you find...

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